Spiritual Lessons of Heartache
If you have ever been fortunate enough to fall in love with another being, you have also experienced heartache. What is the purpose of heartache? What does heartache have to teach us?
Falling in love with another being is the highest form of grace. We can love many people in different ways, but there is something special about romantic love. You may love your friends but you don’t necessarily want to see them every day. You may love your family, but you don’t expect them to grow together with you in mind, body and soul.
Romantic love is a dance of polarities between two beings drawing them together toward union. The romantic relationship is the first place where most of us begin learning the lessons of love. It is within this context that we feel safe enough to love another being more than we love ourselves. It is here that we begin setting down our separateness and start seeking union with another being.
As the lessons of love progress we start to understand what unconditional love means. We start to see all those places within ourselves where we are selfish and start putting the needs of others before our own. When we have children our sense of self expands yet again, as does our capacity for love and need for selfless service to other beings.
The romantic relationship and family is the classroom of the heart. It is where we learn our richest and most important lessons. But what about when love goes awry? What is to be learned when those we love break our heart?
You Broke Your Own Heart
The most important thing to remember is that no one broke your heart, you broke your own heart. The expectations and ideas you had about that person and your future broke your heart when they turned out not to be true. You were loving them conditionally. You were loving the idea of them and the life you thought you might have. Nobody has the power to break your heart but yourself.
Remember that when love curdles in your heart and turns into anger and hate. You are mourning the death of your ideas and expectations. They turned out not to be the person you thought they were. It is nobody’s fault. Release yourself from the bondage of your erroneous ideas and expectations about them and decide from a place of authenticity whether they are someone with whom you are able to grow into union.
Do now wallow in your anger and frustrated expectations. You are just resisting reality when you do that. That is the path of madness and futility, where heartache will be with you for the rest of your days.
Each relationship has its lessons. Focus on what is to be learned, whether you stay in the relationship or leave it. Notice your patterns. We are drawn to those who have things to teach us. That is why many of us seem to fall in love with different versions of the same person over and over again. You can run away from your lover, but you can’t run away from your karma. You can’t run away from unlearned lessons. They will follow you from one relationship to the next until you learn the lesson.
Look at your past relationships. Is there a theme? What do they have in common? Why did they fail? Until you recognize the pattern and heal the wound within yourself, you will just keep repeating the same relationship with different partners and they will all end the same way.
You are Whole
Many of us wander through life seeking the other half of our soul. But the other half of your soul is already within you. All any other person can do is help you remember. The romantic relationship helps us heal and balance the masculine and feminine polarities within us. It is the balancing of these polarities that ultimately catalyzes the kundalini awakening.
As long as you exist in a state of lack and longing you can only attract karmic relationships designed to help balance the masculine and feminine polarities within you. If you desire a twin flame/twin soul divine union you must first cut the cords of karma that draw you into karmic relationships by learning your karmic lessons. Pretty much all relationships begin as karmic relationships and become a divine union if both partners are committed to healing, evolution, and growing into union. But if one partner is not committed to union you will remain in a karmic relationship rut.
When you have balanced the masculine and feminine energies within yourself, you will become complete within yourself. You will no longer be attracted to karmic relationships. You may see opportunities to repeat old lessons in a different disguise, but you will no longer be drawn into those old karmic patterns.
Instead you will long for a mirror of your own divine complete soul. Two halves cannot come into union. Two incomplete unbalanced souls cannot find completion in another being. They can only attract the lessons to help remember their wholeness.
Only two people in a state of wholeness can hope to achieve divine union with one another. The divine counterpart is a clear mirror through which we see ourselves more clearly. It is someone with whom we share our bliss, our peace, and our mission with.
The divine union is of God. It is the highest manifestation of the romantic relationship. It is the point at which the aspiration for union in mind, body and soul with another being becomes realized. Those who come into divine union serve a very special purpose on this planet. Souls come into divine union in order to amplify one another in their joint mission to serve the healing and evolution of this planet.